Change The Game : The Kadavule Kaappathu Shot!!! Or Hey Bhagwan Mujhe Bachaoo Shot!!

Well you have all seen Pietersen with the Tharbooza


Dilshan with the Pallu
,

Bhajji with his tingly

(??).

What if the people over at Pepsi “get idea”?? This is my version of “Change the Game”

Ouchhh!!!

Player Involved : Prince of Kolkata , The Person other than God on the offside : Sourav Ganguly

Location : Pillayar Koil Near Chennai (peculiar location , anything other than Kolkata would be so, but let us take the poetic license)

Initial sequences shall show Sourav getting hit , left , right and centre. See left first, kolkata special. < I guess sourav never went to night clubs, he was afraid of bouncers>. Now getting back to business, Sourav watches devotees doing the ashirvad(no , not the atta), hands above in praying position, head bowed down,saying “Kadavule Kappaathu” . Sourav feels it is an elegant way to handle bouncers. “Ippa matchlayum ippadiye pannu” . Sourav duly obliges.

Here are some tips for Dada to Pull it off 😛

Step 1 : Now , close your eyes, Dada

Step 2: Put your Hands up to your chest, duck your head.

Step 3: Now Turn 360 degrees saying “Kadavule Kappathu” (Hey Bhagwan, Mujhe Bachaooo)

Cue Background Music : “kadavule Kappathu , kadavule kappathu

Sourav : “The official sponsor of : The Kadavule Kappathu shot”

If Sourav does follow this , he might have to “Change the game”, play golf if he could 🙂


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How to lose fans and alienate people?

Every Cricket fan’s dilemma

A global event like the World Cup offers opportunities to the host country to open up to global tourism. But the BCCI thinks otherwise. Even before the ‘showpiece’ event kicked off , I felt that there was very little hype/publicity surrounding the tournament. It feels like the BCCI were working on the sole premise that has brought in the moolah – “Cricket sells”. How else can you explain Ten Cricket acquiring the rights for “Jharkand Premier League”??

In a country where Cricketers are revered as Gods and damned as Traitors based on the latest results, BCCI knew from the start that they need not go out and sell their product to the world. People would buy at any cost. But the scenes at Nagpur and Bengalooru show the real apathy that the cricketing board has towards the fans. One can blame the public for creating a scene and disorder at the ticketing areas but much onus should have been on the board to make sure that everything runs smoothly. On top of all this comes the news that the general public might not have tickets for the world cup final.

Is the ICC killing it’s own tournament screams the article in the previous link. Which I feel is very much true. Every Indian fan would have harbored the hopes of watching the finals on Apr 2 , but with the lottery system and the chaos surrounding the ticket sales, I am not sure how many people would bother. If the performances of the Indian team are anything to go by, buying a ticket to the finals seems too much pain for nothing.

A Shared-Auto Ride!!

To Share (v) : joint use of a resource or space. In its narrow sense, it refers to joint or alternating use of an inherently finite good, such as a common pasture or a shared residence. It is also the process of dividing and distributing. .

Unknown to the definition framers over at Wikipedia.org exists a sinister and more practical meaning for the word ‘Sharing’. It can only be appreciated by someone who has , for at least for once in their life, put their life on the line while traveling on one of the more modern methods of Transit in IT-India. No we are not talking about Jet skis or roller blades but the “Share-Auto”.

Notice the sinister use of the word share. It doesn’t actually mean that you get a share of space on the vehicle. No,  No No. Share-Auto riding refers to an ingenius cost cutting solution that allows upto 20 people to travel on an Auto. The Share-Auto is as much an adventure sport as it is an ingenious economic solution. Imagine able to travel Kms in an Indian Suburb for 1/10th the original fare. But like all schemes offered by Super villains, the Share-Auto has a catch.

Imagine having to packed like sardines in an auto , which mentions 7 in all. For those who might think that it means the total number of passengers, I pity you all. It actually refers to the number of people that can/should be accommodated in every possible direction. Perilous you  think?? Oh we are not done yet.

Like all things modern , the Share-Auto also has a sinister sidekick, if you would. It is called the MP3Player. Yes you heard it right. As you travel from point A to point B clinging to the inches allotted to you by the driver’s right hand , i e the Cleaner, you are made to listen to minutes of brilliant music that you didn’t know existed. Some of them are the most mind-numbing tracks of the 90s to the blatant techno hits of Himmesh Reshammiya!!! I guess there can be a separate post for the “Shared-Auto” discography. Here are some of the tracks that seem to hit the top in this category.

MYOOSICK


This is perhaps the most epic song  i have ever heard on a share-auto. Listen to the lyrics , the underlying meaning, the pathos . Try to listen to this with a straight face.

you just have to marvel at the vocal range of Kumar Sanu in the era of these songs.
Simple 90’s/Late 80’s Bollywood MYooSick Generator = (Kumar Sanu + Alka Yagnik) (Copious amounts of Meherbaan, Saaheban, Dil,Jigar,Pyaar)

This one has to be my most favorite irritant song. It takes the cake. Thank god there aren’t video screens yet. Else you would have to put up with the voice as well as the face!!! *gasp*. And to add to all there is the techno-remix version that is most played.

cue :facepalm!!
Cost Cutting does have it’s perils ya know.

The Game no one really wanted to win

One small question put forward to Ravi Shastri, How many times does he actually mean what he says?? “The atmosphere here is electric”, the atmosphere here is absolutely electric. I guess by that he means it is plainly electric and nothing electronic. Just as “it was nothing personal , just business” . Next time I hear him saying that electric thingy , I am gonna keep count just to start a social cause for him to save ‘electricity’. Coming to what was originally the point of this whole post , the tied game or as I would like to call the ‘Game that no one really wanted to win’.

I mean what team would score 330 odd or even and give up 270 odd for just 2 wickets and suddenly remember they are not playing a warm up match?? And what team would choke (almost) within touching distance after their opening left handed batsman/ captain scores a century? No not South Africa. Everybody was on the edge of their seats, well, everyone except Deepika Padukone, wonder what happened there. A few UDRS reviews , ‘well of course’s later no one won. Ya you heard it right no one won.